Blue petals

took a break from my usual jogging routine.. as i hit the lagoon on the return leg.. i decided to pause for a moment at the water front and take in the sea breeze.. the sky was a welcoming orangey glow and nat king cole's little ditty about wham, bam, alakazaam came into my mind.. lifting my spirits up a little.. i was standing there in awe of the beautiful sight presenting itself right in front of my eyes.. suddenly the noise of a bunch of rowdy kids making a nuisance of themselves doesnt seem to bother me very much anymore.. i close my eyes and took a deep breath.. something i have not done for a really really long time.. just take the time out to realise how little we all are in the grand scheme of things.. looking at how vast the oceans (in this case.. the sea) is and how wide the edges of the skies are cast always knock some sense into me.. telling me how insignificant all of us are.. we are but here for a good part of 70 years and this natural wonder will still be here even when we are gone..

the beach has always had a nice calming effect on me.. weird considering the fact tat i am not a good swimmer and can never really appreciate water sports.. i mean.. look at how butchy the female swimmers are~!! i love the serenity tat the crashing of waves against the shoreline gives me.. i remember lying flat down on the sand and looking up at the great big sky hanging over our heads.. i will stretch out my arms and imagine myself falling towards the sky.. defying gravity.. and the funny thing was.. whenever i imagined tat.. i cant picture myself ever stopping... tat is how vast the universe is and how very very tiny we all are.. i look up at the stars and try to recall the constellations.. something that i am never good at cos i can never really be bothered trying to memorise them.. i try to picture some other beings in a planet far away tat might be doin the exact same thing i am doin now.. and we are in the line of sight of each other! how cool is tat?

all these while in the perspective of this tiny little red dot in a rough neighbourhood tat outsiders call south east asia.. imagine the limitless boundary-less viewpoints and mindsets of great men who grow up in a land so vast tat they do not lament the existence of wishers and thinkers who do not contribute to a national cause.. tough luck i'm in one tat does not encourage individuality.. one tat does not look beyond free-spiritedness unless its the catalyst for the next entrepreneurial mind.. a trip out of the country would be good.. a prolonged one better.. a permanent one best.. ah.. my siblings DO know wat they're doing~!!

Days of our lives

lots of long lost contacts have been popping up from out of the blue recently.. a former business associate from suzhou popped by my msn window the other day... greeting me.. a long lost business contact from the machinery trading industry suddenly gave me a call seeking new cooperation opportunities.. a very hardworking and earnest former site staff sending his regards to me thru a fren whom i tot i've lost but was kind enough to call me up and chit chat heart to heart about the misgivings towards each other.. its heartening to see the positive karma from a not too long ago past catching up with you and letting you know tat all is not bleak and the pharkers tat are currently screwing you are just bad hats tat u hv to experience somewhere down the line in the business realm tat will only let you learn a valuable (and expensive!!) lesson and strenghten your resolve to seek trustworthy partners in the future...

wonderful opportunities lie waiting ahead and at the end of the day.. i can safely say tat my greed is the only factor tat has set me back by 10 steps after i've taken 11.. its still 1 step ahead for the matter and i am glad tat i am where i am today.. still having the balls to dream and break out of the mould tat binds so many of us.. i caught a wonderfully hilarious musical tonight tat plays on the reality of modern day singapore heavily and it really does make me realise tat i might have lost a little of my humanity over the past 2 years of my life.. spent fervently in pursuit of the mighty buck.. there lies the dichotomy of the whole situation.. if we do not seek it.. wat can make us feel tat we've led a meaningful life? perhaps being born into a family where the head of the household is a capable hardworking man who had toiled the best parts of his life providing a better life for his offspring, i am in-bred to feel the compulsion to do likewise for my next generation.. but then again.. i look at my siblings who are rather contented to kick back with their relatively at ease lifestyle and wondered why i am the only one who have inherited the drive to make an attempt to free myself from the stranglehold of being gainfully employed.. fate does play a part in how a person shapes out..

2006 looks to be a great year ahead with the multiple ideas tat have cropped up and opportunities that have laid itself in my path.. i shall take the lessons from the first 5 years of the 21st century and mould a better future for myself.. positive thinking never harms anyone.. and if all else fails.. gainful employment is just a simple cover letter and CV away~!!

cheers~!!

On the day you were born

read today in a biography that john lennon was assassinated on 8th dec 1980 and the date struck me.. ain't tat the date that the lizard king was born? was there some kinda cosmic forces surrounding that date? nah.. i would think its more a situation of coincidence than anything else.. curious.. i googled a bit and this is wat else i found out

08/12/1925 - Sammy Davis Jr birthdate
08/12/1953 - Kim Basinger birthdate (ooh la la~!!)
08/12/1962 - Marty Friedman's birthdate
08/12/1964 - Teri Hatcher's birthdate
08/12/1966 - Sinead O Connor's birthdate
08/12/1976 - The Eagles released Hotel California
08/12/2004 - The guitarist of Pantera was shot dead on stage

and this is what i found out about my birthdate~!!
12/04/1606 - The Union Jack is adopted as the national flag of Great Britain
12/04/1940 - Herbie Hancock's birthdate
12/04/1941 - Bobby Moore's birthdate
12/04/1945 - Death of Franklin D Roosevelt
12/04/1947 - Tom Clancy and also David Letterman's birthdate
12/04/1954 - Bill Haley and His Comets recorded "Rock around the Clock" which was responsible for the rock and roll revolution
12/04/1961 - The first man to fly in space
12/04/1975 - Khmer Rouge troops capture Pnomh Penh in Cambodia
12/04/1981 - The first launch of a space shuttle Columbia

i also realised tat i share my birthday with claire danes, david cassidy, andy garcia, shannen doherty, mateja kezman, guy berryman.. i'm in rather good company eh? except for miss real love tat is...

Bustin' and Dronin'

as i picked up my guitar.. i realised.. i am so void of inspiration of late.. so drained of emotions.. so dried up of the vibes to get myself into a few hours worth of frantically plucking and strumming away.. sometimes to the hi-fi.. other times just singing out loud.. once in a while composing.. its weird.. tat side of me just suddenly.. turned off.. hope its not permanent though.. even when playing along to my mp3s.. i felt so out of sync with damn yankees, extreme, gnr and those great folks whose tunes i always sing and play along to.. wats wrong with me huh?

just did some last bits of christmas shopping.. made me realised how mechanised the sales staff have all become.. the interaction is like some standard sales script memorised by the retail staff.. they must have come across multitudes who are christmas shopping and there is nothing festive about their service attitudes and quality at all.. this is bad.. i mean.. yes.. the holiday season is meant to remember TAT famous jewish carpenter.. and yet.. some fat jolly paedo asking little kids to sit on his lap while he hides behind a thick false beard takes centre stage somewhat... truly reflecting the commercial potential of the festival and its appeal to merchants.. perhaps tat only happens in singapore.. service staff who are very much like the students from our educational system.. from the production line.. meant to fit into a part of the well-oiled engine working our economic miracle overtime into fantastic growth figures and financial empowerment for the masses.. a lot of soul is missing from us these days.. the most pronounced emotion is angst i guess.. enough about tat.. tis the season to be jolly remember?

christmas always overwhelmed me with merriment every year.. i guess it has its roots from the many sunset mass i attended with my catholic aunt when i was really young.. and the christmas parties thereafter.. filled with little kids curious about the presents they are going to get.. being able to rub the belly of the fat paedo.. have a picture taken with him.. ah.. memories..

Start spreading the news

i'm leaving today.. i'm gonna make a BRAND NEW start of it.. new york new york!! if i can make it there.. i'm gonna make it... anywhere.. its up to you... new york~!! new york~!!


grand lines.. inspiring wind section accompanying the melodious crooning of mr S.. he would have been 90 today.. a tad too aged to be still prowling the streets of new jersey, where he was born, in search of a proxy to his true love.. a lady whose name resembles green fingers too closely... one who..despite being of a totally different demographic group.. possesses the values of family ties so closely akin to asian morals.. a man whose grand scheme of things come crumbling down cruelly in his later years due to the wasteful ways of a vase tat could never fulfill the forgotten promise of one whom he held in deep regard but could never win her heart back.. i'd have to agree with mr rattle and hum when he said tat it is indeed true a great singer would never be able to conjure up such deep emotions in his representation(s) if he had not been through the deep heartaches tat are chronicled in oh so many sad love songs.. now u know why i loathe bubble gum pop even if some of the tunes are catchy and leaves an irritating ring in your head..

once again.. the lifestyle of one so musically talented is something that i can never agree with.. trampling upon pple.. using those who are chains on the elevator up the empire state.. exhibiting excessive wealth to mask insecurities and unhappiness.. you name things tat will consign u to the woeful 18 levels in haw par villa.. this man has done it.. and yet.. his tunes accompanied me thru many difficult periods of my life.. i draw a lot of inspiration from the raw studio outtakes from a time when remastering and over-laying simply do not exist.. each song was presented as it is.. from the thickened skin of the string player's fingers to the expanded lungs of the trumpet blowers.. its the true heartfelt renditions tat stands the test of time.. talk to me about the belakang boys in 20 yrs time.. they will be like a forgotten entity.. mentioned with nary a whisper of adulation.. probably some embarrased 40-something who'd hate to be reminded tat they've once chased them down the streets of LA several cycles ago trying to get a pic or catch a glimpse of their "heroes" who have since went on to develop a ghastly paunch not unlike those of their husbands now..

mr S will always be a hero to me.. in spite of the severe beatings he withstood and the desperate measures tat he took to generate dough to feed some waif's disgustingly materialistic habits.. music does stand the test of time and his are those tat will remind you of many precious moments tat you'll cherish.. kept locked up up in a tiny corner of your head.. refrenced upon at various times of your life.. bringing a smile to your face.. getting you back in touch with your true self and finding the inner strength and beautiful courage to face the challenges tat lie ahead..


"I have been a rover
I have walked alone
Hiked a hundred highways
Never found a home
Still in all I'm happy
The reason is, you see..
Once in a while along the way
Love's been good to me

There was a girl in Denver
Before the summer storm
Oh, her eyes were tender
Oh, her arms were warm
And she could smile away the thunder
Kiss away the rain
Even though she's gone away, you won't hear me complain

I have been a rover
I have walked alone
Hiked a hundred highways
Never found a home
Still in all I'm happy
The reason is, you see
Once in a while along the way
Love's been good to me

There was a girl in Portland
Before the winter chill
We used to go a-courtin'
Along October hill
And she could laugh away the dark clouds
Cry away the snow
It seems like only yesterday
As down the road I go

I've been a rover
I have walked alone
Hiked a hundred highways
Never found a home
Still in all I'm happy
The reason is, you see
Once in a while along the way
Love's been good to me"
-Love's Been Good To Me, Frank Sinatra

Personals

Dusting away the dreams

i woke up to a crazy little thing called love today.. lest one might be led to think tat i spent an evening with a romantic partner.. no.. its the short messaging system tone on my mobile.. a fren has invited me to attend some kinda religious gathering.. i replied an immediate "no" and pple who know me well will know which dot org religious institute i am talking about here.. gosh.. dun these pple make enough money already? seriously..

ok.. since this is a beautiful sunday.. i do not want to go on ranting about this.. the fren was nice enough to ask me along cos she knew tat i am going thru a rough patch and tot tat i might need some divine intervention to lead me out of this.. its not tat i dun believe in a God above.. its just tat i do not believe in worshipping God TAT way... know wat i mean? hahaha..

its quite funny actually how my weekend had turned out.. i caught a really funny show tat sometime bordered on the corny.. i mean.. how much creative juices can be milked to fill up a 2 hours slot with endless witty comedy and punch lines? however.. there are moments when i seriously tot i might have a recurrence of asthma from my childhood.. there was even a segment on blogging! these guys can take the most serious of topics and relate them in a comedic yet tasteful manner.. there were too much mention of shiny happy pple though.. its being over-apologetically self deprecating in some ways.. why the need to do tat?

dad has got a new set of wheels.. and the funny thing is.. its a good 2k cheaper than my first set of wheels and yet its engine is capable of delivering 700cc more power... there are reverse sensor cameras.. cruise control.. really nice comfy and full automatic seats.. blah blah blah.. the ability to buy a much larger car cheaply can be attributed to 2 factors.. technological advancement and fuelling the singh kaporh dream.. of owning a nice beautiful executive *ahem ahem* flat.. wonderfully retrofitted *ahem ahem* cars.. nice expensive dinners over overly priced fermented grapes.. u get the picture.. hahaha... how many more are going to fall prey? only time will tell..

Windflowers

ok.. so i gotta admit it.. i'm a smitten kitten.. someone so cute, sweet, cool, intelligent, witty and delightful..

someone so mysterious.. so out of reach for an average joe like me.. but i'm really in a bad place right now.. feel really burnt out.. really weary of dating.. and yet.. this fine lass is like a bright spark in a rather negatively eventful year for me.. its like a bright spot from out of the blue tat hits me suddenly.. i really can't wait for the new year now.. hahaha..

so its probably a good thing tat i am making a much desired trip to pay homage to my hero mr morrison towards the end of this month.. with a fren whom i hold very dear to my heart.. after all the misgivings of the past with pple in my circle.. i have gotten a clearer picture of the insecurities and ill-feelings generated in some members due to my representation of my position.. having tasted success and then succumbed to greed so much so tat i defied my father's wishes.. its all a lesson learnt at the end of the day.. moving on is the best way to deal with the negative air tat hangs over the head of personnels honing beeping devices tat makes their lives miserable out of the dealing room and into the sucky atmosphere tat exists in their x-axis..

2006.. the year of the canine companion.. of sly and the family stone and morrison's favourite bar.. i certainly do hope so...

and bro.. if u are reading this.. laugh not ok? kimchi numbing nuances...

62 and counting

"Cancel my subsciption to the resurrection, send my credentials to the house of detention" - When the Music's Over

"Women seem wicked, when you're unwanted. Streets are uneven when you're down" - People are Strange

"Unhappy girl, tear your web away. Saw thru all your bars, melt your cell today. You are caught in a prison of your own device" - Unhappy Days

"House upon a hill, moon is lying still, shadows on the tree, witnessing the wild breeze come on baby run with me" - Not to Touch the Earth

"We chased our pleasures here, dug our treasures there." - Break on Through

"Before you slip into unconsciousness, I would like to have another kiss. Another flashing chance at bliss" - The Crystal Ship

"Some are born to sweet delight, some are born to endless nights" - End of the Night

"The soft parade has now begun. Listen to the engine hum. People out to have some fun. A cobra on my left, leopard on my right" - The Soft Parade

8th Dec 1943.. a significant date for a person like me.. who is very much influenced by the works of a certain james douglas morrison.. the lifestyle's a little disturbing.. consumption of alcohol's excessive.. experience with drugs are experimental and morrison was never an advocate of substance abuse.. public drunkedness and violent behaviours' childish.. beyond this little kid who was suddenly endowed with immense wealth lies a warped but talented men who read volumes of works and possesses immense knowledge of literature, history and mystical stories about shamans and goddesses...

he would have been 62 today.. a little too shrivelled up to be living life dangerously but hey.. shouldnt we be remembering morrison as the lithe figure with his arms outstretched aka the young lion picture instead of struggling in his later years looking.. to borrow the words of my bro.. like a prune.. being sun-dried and all.. so its probably a good thing that he went under our radar at the age of 27.. forever enshrined in a legacy like no other.. and not bothered with watever the rest of his family and band mates are doing now.. suing the ass of each other for using the band name.. morrison must have either turned in his grave or shuddered in his pyjamas over his morning breakfast when he reads this in the dailies..

i briefly encountered the magic of this master while i was still in my teens.. then a renowned director had enlisted the help of a future dark knight to retell the story of an abusive and pushy drunk non-conformist.. i never did pay him much attention until i was in my first years of being in the corporate world.. i chanced upon the CD again and it became the most highly played disc amongst the sinatras, andersons, albarns, tengs, presleys.. etc etc.. yes.. i DO have a varied musical taste.. curious about a man who died in his prime.. i read extensively about him.. ordering books online.. from many different authors offering widely different perspective and with different agenda and/or propanganda.. i read his poetry which i regarded as rather crappy at first sitting.. but the words hit you differently everytime you re-visit the pages of an american night or wilderness.. the capability of this man starts to consume me and i even use his moniker for several of my identification purposes in anonymous situations.. but tat is another story altogether..

notwithstanding.. this post is dedicated to the talent of James Douglas Morrison, a man whose lifestyle i can never agree with.. in spite of this.. this is a man who successfully transcends the poetry and musical era and mash these into a dark yet amazingly soothing mix of spiritual highs and lows.. a man whose talent was never reflected upon by most people beyond his various highly-publicised-to-boost-the-circulation-figures controversies.. a wildchild.. a music man.. Mr Mojo Risin'.. THE Lizard King..

My all time favourite things?

Raindrops on white tees and full grown sex kittens
Bright copper-toned skin that glows when u lick em
Brown sugar sleeps with you, tied to no strings
These are a few of my favourite things

Cream colored big tits that shakes when you fondle
Doggie and snowplough and kinky new angles
Wild girls that screw while their mood never swings
These are a few of my favourite things

Girls with no dresses say oh aint tat precious?
Snowy white lingerie sting my eyelashes
Silver white nighties I shread into bits
These are a few of my favourite things

When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favourite things, and than I don't feel so bad!