Jacques Grande??

yesh.. north to the land of pompous windbags.. a siren sings of emotions drifting back into the state of mind.. it is seemingly bizarre to chance upon someone from eons ago in your memory giving you their birthday wishes on a platform that you dun realise exist till about the time the sun rises previously... deep inside oneself you were convinced that the fire is raging on and the ill feelings extended as a result of a deep hurt.. that we apparently gone..

one then cannot help but wonder about the kinda hurt that you have caused.. the kind of damage inflicted upon someone young.. impressionable.. who brought nothing to the table initially but a heart that is eager to love.. arms that yearn to hold their true love.. yet you have let the person down over and over again.. mired yourself in events that breaks down the social order and tested the boundaries of sanity..

its extremely liberating to read about the hurt that has seeped so deep into someone's heart that they are still smarting from it 730 days on and while one was happily swimming around in the military college with the may queen..

this world really makes for interesting lab tests.. to be administered by whichever beings are being sustained by traces of water on mars..

ratrace

took some time out to reflect upon the rat race.. i had been waylaid in the past by unrealistic notions of the flights of fantasies but realise right now it is never too late to start all things on a fresh page..

i need to break out of a certain mould that pple dictate me by and start living my life the way i want to live it...

Morphin'

changes.. 7 months.. 3 re-organisations.. zero changes.. for now.. new faces have come.. lots of old faces have left.. many gaps still exist.. many newcomers have filled positions and are grasping at the air now for directions and control.. which is sorely lacking..

can i say something is wrong here? i do not wholeheartedly think so but common sense awaken me otherwise.. well.. if there's nothing wrong... something ain't right either.. its a weird paradoxical situation.. you see nothing wrong yet have the sneaky suspicion that right things are not exactly around either..

the k-ok session has heightened my attachment to certain factions within the shitezahole... good or bad.. i really have no sense.. plunging head first into an unknown entity has always been a feature of my past efforts (or mistakes) but i really do not know what to make of this vastness right now.. lots had been said about the pillar in this place but nothing is cast in stone or offers concrete foundations and background..

loving zero is looking groovier by the day and yet.. the handphone shop's massive frontage also has its draw.. the ability to generate positive vibes and melody also impressed the royal reptile into admiration and delight..

there is also the aerosmith factor at work here.. nothing more nothing less.. lots lying around in waiting but i've come to realise its never really worth it.. bret michaels has said it succintly before remarking that the best things in life ain't free..

the session's next thursday.. hope everything flies off to a rousing event.. working with mr lalas on the actual verbal delivery by the leader.. its a magnified version of the 3 month stint..

history however.. shall NOT repeat itself... hallelujah~!!

Nothing left to do but...

....RUN RUN RUN!!

house upon the hill? more like at the foot of the hill..
moon is lying still? dude.. it moves faster than schumacher on ice..
shadows of the trees.. seriously.. let me know wat time and i can let you know wat kinda shadow manz
witnessing the wild breeze.. er.. why is a witness necessary?

anyways.. after the smart aleck contrived comments about one good individual we shall all confer the title of the royal reptile.. let us take stock of life and ponder.. why are we here? being all libated and loose with words.. yet rattle on with nary a hint of remorse and regret of wat we've done and the kind of hurt we've caused particular inividuals.. we have done severe soul depleting excuses of deeds but tat doesnt mean we should go on being the bastardious self of lies.. deceit and self exhaultion.. woe befall those who subscribe to this school of tot..

for the record... i shall move on.. i carry upon my shoulders burden of emotions but in order for my cosmic mate to seek true joy.. i shall graciously step back and let nature take its warped conceited devious course...

Kimchi Numbing Nuances..

The Laughs

its been a really really long time since i was able to belt out a hearty laughter and enjoy my moment and take stock of life.. there had been sporadic bursts of happiness and joy but no over-arching sense of wild abandonment.. having said that.. there are no moments of extreme downs as well...

so its all well balanced and fine.. no highs.. no lows.. but being a man of a emotionally wide spectrum.. this can be a unfulfilling state of being.. yet this is what most seek out to achieve from the day we bellow and cry out having just been delivered by our sweet mum in labour..

i wish i can find the peaceful state of being to be contented and joyful and yet this fool just want to seek a high.. a mountain to climb and squeeze the mortal life out of.. to scale the peaks of wishful sins and burrow in the joy of deep seated happiness...

god help me find this plain.. i cant complain